You're a good guy, Moondog!Could not agree with your more Mr. Les! Good points all the way around!! On a personal level, here is my position on your 5 points (and I feel very lucky to be in such positions):
1. Release ourselves from the irrational fantasy of stardom.
NEVER wanted stardom! This is why I set up my publishing company the way I did, very hidden!! I also set it up in such a way that I can publish under multiple artist names and not have others trying to pigeon hole me to a specific genre!!! People who desire the fantasy of stardom, do not believe in themselves, therefore needing the adoration of others to feel good ;~((
2. Release ourselves from the corollary of the stardom fantasy, which is that if you're not a star, you've somehow failed.
As mentioned above, those who feel they failed were probably trying to achieve something other than creative output, they were simply trying to be fabulous to as many people as possible! I am lucky enough to not care what others think of what I do, because I am doing it for myself!! If others enjoy it, that is icing on the cake, but I am eating my cake with our without any icing and it tastes great!!! When I released my first song in 2014, my inhibitions about not having accomplished anything were lifted off my shoulders and I no longer viewed my life (from a creative viewpoint) as a failure!!!! Up until then though, I kicked myself almost daily for not doing anything with my talents for decades, but it wasn't a "I am not famous" kick, it was a "you haven't done sh!t with your gifts" kick!!!!!
3. Do the damn work.
On it! But I don't call it work, gives a bad taste to it IMO!! CREATE!!! One of the friends I was able to hook up with in my recent travels has the nickname of "Rockstar"! This is due to the fact that he was just that to me and our mutual friends in the decades past!! Lead singer of a popular band, all the chicks wanted him, wrote good stuff, etc.!!!! I was staying at his house initially on this trip, and ended up moving to my nieces house because it just made me cry that all he wanted to do was drink, and viewed his music as work!!!! We have been friends for over 35 years, and the only time we ever jammed together was at an open mic night they used to have at one of our hangouts many decades ago (played bass on Message In A Bottle one night). Now that I am able to play over 100 songs (including some of his), I was so excited about jamming with him, but it never happened and he got salty about me even suggesting that we should spend some time jamming because he is viewing music strictly as work these days!!!! Heart crushing to say the least ;~((
4. Share the damn work.
On it! Sharing your creations may help someone else as well and whether it does or not, it will help you to release it from within, which will make room for more creations (rather than that stuff just cycling through your brain and soul)!!! In the immortal words of Bob Dylan "I need a dump truck baby to, unload my head"!!!! If you don't unload what is in there, you will be driving around with a full load and be prevented from picking up a new a lot of new material!!!!!
5. Your mom still loves you.
And too much IMO all things considered! I did just play for her about 6 days ago, but it was early in the morning and the voice was not awake yet so I did not sing!! I had not seen her since the pandemic started, and I had picked up a beater guitar at CME a few days prior (Gretsch Streamliner - wanted a cheap jazz box I would not have to worry about and at $495, I thought it played and sounded great)!!! I played for her not because I wanted a pat on the head, but because I know how excited she is about me finally making the music that has existed inside me my entire life!!! But yes, play for your mom and other family/friends, I was excited to be able to do that on this 3 week journey I just had!!!!
This is all good stuff (the whole thread) and I hope that folk will find wisdom and confidence in the concepts portrayed here! Thanks again for starting it and contributing your knowledge/experience/thoughts on this topic, Mr. L!!!!
But of course my post was a general principles kinda thing, wasn't directed at you at all. You seem like a very level-headed person, one who's creative and likes the enjoyment of music.
More power to you!