Warning. Long story!
I told part of this before, but here is my story about learning theory in college. My friend from previous story (singer in the band I was in during college, owned the Mesa Mark II, was a great front man, was in the college music and theater programs, that guy...) talked me into taking a music theory class in college. We had to take a certain amount of "arts" classes and I was BEYOND done with real "art" classes because I can't draw or paint ANYTHING!
So Dave convinces me to take a music theory class. We show up the first day of class and the teacher spends about 30 minutes going over the class objectives, what we'll cover, what we'll do, all that stuff. In front of the class is an upright piano and an acoustic guitar and Yamaha keyboard. After his 30 minute introduction, he goes around to each student asking what their primary instrument is, what other music classes they've had in college, what their "background" is in music, and how many instruments you can sight read music on. What prior classical training they've had, etc. (Anybody know where this is going?)
When he gets to me, I tell him that I've had no other music classes in college (this was my soph. year), that I'm not in the music program or the theater program and that I play guitar but I can only read music on piano. He looks at me and says "why are you in this class?" I said "to learn music theory." He says "but you can't read music on guitar?" I answered that I could actually figure out any of it, but no I could not just read it and play it while reading it. He asks how I got in the class... I said "what do you mean how did I get in the class. I signed up for it just like any other class." And he laughed at me. (This is where things go south, for those keeping score at home).
He said "so, you don't even have a basic understanding of music and you thought you could take a college music theory class so that you could start to learn music?" I replied "no, I took classical piano lessons for 10 years and was advanced for my age, but I switched to guitar a couple years ago." He very sarcastically said "so you took piano lessons as a child and thought you could take college level music theory class?" Needless to say... now I'm PISSED! I said, "by the time I was 12-13 I was playing Bach, Mozart, Beethoven, etc. I wasn't playing Mary Had A Little Lamb." Now he knows I'm pissed and he's embarrassed me, but he doesn't seem to mind. He says "But you can't even read music on guitar?" I said again "no, I said I can't sight read and play a song. I know basic chords, and can figure out anything but I play by ear so I normally don't even look at written music."
Well now I had said the magic words... "by ear" must be the magic words for a music professor. He laughed out loud. He called me to the front of the room and handed me the guitar and said "play a G chord." I did, then A, then D, then C then F... anyway, then he said "play a C major scale. I did. Then he said Am9 or something and I said I didn't know what version of the A that was, but could play it if I heard it OR could figure it out. Then he said MY magic words... he said "well, you appear to have at least a basic grasp of how to play guitar, but I still don't know why you think you're ready for a college level music theory class, and unfortunately they never should have let you sign up for the class without verifying that you were advanced enough to take the class." Then he said the magic words again... "you're a beginner level guitarist and aren't advanced enough to even take this class. What did you hope to gain by taking it?"
Story is too long. Sorry. But I was completely DONE with being embarrassed and called out in front of about 35 other students, most of which I knew. And, I was sitting there with his guitar in my hands.
I said "well, maybe you can help me" and I played Eruption on the acoustic guitar. ( I know it's cliche' now but that's what you did in 1980 to show off on guitar. LOL) At the end, I got a big ovation from the class. I handed him the guitar and said "I was just hoping you could teach me how to play guitar. Sorry for wasting your time" and walked out of the class. He tried to call me back but I kept going.
That was my last experience with learning theory.
And will probably remain my "last" experience with learning theory.