Musician Jokes-post yours

[Clashcityrocker]

What's the difference between a chalkboard and an Ibanez guitar?

When nails are applied the chalkboard sounds better.

 

[CandidPicker]

If Einstein could play an instrument, what would it be? This?

 

[Deleted member 5962]

I never liked Rush’s music, but so many folks here love the band that I decided to give them another listen, so I spent an afternoon with their recordings. I couldn’t get all the way through a single song.

It was a slog through several albums that were recommended as their best.

They don’t need me as a critic, and I wish them all success, but I didn’t find the recordings musical, and would prefer listening to Bieber (or anyone else except my own music, which everyone including me agrees has no redeeming merit, and makes me want to flood my studio, and turn it into an indoor pool; alternatively, it would make a nice room for my wife to store boxes ‘just in case’ she wants to return something to the store ).

I never thought this day would come. And I’m sure this is going to hurt you just as much as it hurts me. But... we just can’t be friends anymore. I know... “us people” are told to “forgive and forget.” 70 times 7 and all that. But this is simply inexcusable because it’s willful indifference. I’m a man of his word, but the “Old guys metal” project is over until you find a new partner. The vacation in the Bahamas... sorry, you’ll have to make other plans.

I don’t want to do this! You leave me no choice. I’m devastated. But I have to keep moving forward.

 

[jxe]

it’s like in the old testament where no one could name a good rush song and they burned toronto.

 

[Deleted member 5962]

That is NOT in my Old Testament

 

[Huggy Love]

 

[jxe]

‘is that sandalwood incense in this van?’

 

[Alnus Rubra]

Nobody pokes fun at Abba for dressing like this! It was the 70’s after all.

 

[alantig]

Nobody pokes fun at Abba for dressing like this! It was the 70’s after all.

Or Erasure.

 

[sergiodeblanc]

Nobody pokes fun at Abba for dressing like this! It was the 70’s after all.

Or Erasure.

That’s because both those bands are awesome.

 

[bodia]

That’s because both those bands are awesome.

Almost as awesome as Rush

 

[bodia]

I never thought this day would come. And I’m sure this is going to hurt you just as much as it hurts me. But... we just can’t be friends anymore. I know... “us people” are told to “forgive and forget.” 70 times 7 and all that. But this is simply inexcusable because it’s willful indifference. I’m a man of his word, but the “Old guys metal” project is over until you find a new partner. The vacation in the Bahamas... sorry, you’ll have to make other plans.

I don’t want to do this! You leave me no choice. I’m devastated. But I have to keep moving forward.

I stand with you!

 

[sergiodeblanc]

Almost as awesome as Rush

For people to make fun of.

 

[jxe]

there’s nothing funny about the star guitar, and ‘one night in bangkok’ is as good as ‘a passage to bangkok’— check it out les!

 

[sergiodeblanc]

there’s nothing funny about the star guitar, and ‘one night in bangkok’ is as good as ‘a passage to bangkok’— check it out les!

I’m pretty sure Les is a Murray Head fan already.

 

[dmatthews]

For people to make fun of.

I love you man... but I put bacon in my salad last night.

 

[Wakester]

Whoops! Opened the wrong can of worms. Sorry if I killed any friendships. You can ban me from the group, I'll take it like a man.

 

[Deleted member 5962]

Whoops! Opened the wrong can of worms. Sorry if I killed and friendships. You can ban me from the group, I'll take it like a man.

Just say three "Hail Rush. HAIL YES" and you'll be ok.

 

[bodia]

For people to make fun of.

I love you man... but I put bacon in my salad last night.

I just wrapped the Ted in bacon

 

[sergiodeblanc]

I just wrapped the Ted in bacon

I’d still eat that.