Musician Jokes-post yours

[Clashcityrocker]

What do you call a guitarist without a girlfriend?
Homeless....

There was a guy who wanted to be in a band,
First he tried guitar, couldn't figure out the 6 strings
Then he tried bass, couldn't do the 4 strings
Next he tried drums but couldn't handle the 2 drumsticks
He finally ended up as singer because there is just one mic!

 

[dmatthews]

A lady was recently arrested for beating her husband to death with his own guitar collection.
At her initial appearance in court the judge leaned over, scowled at her and said "First offender?"

She said no... first a Gibson, then a Fender.

 

[django49]

Musician jokes?

Justin Bieber.
Nickleback.

 

[Ovibos]

What do you call someone who hangs out with musicians?

A drummer!

 

[goat-n-gitter]

How do you get the drummer off of your porch?


Pay for the pizza.

 

[Wakester]

How do you keep a drummer in suspense?

 

[11top]

 

[11top]

 

[Wakester]

All my musician jokes lately tend to be flat.

 

[11top]

 

[11top]

 

[11top]

 

[Wakester]

 

[Wakester]

 

[Wakester]

 

[alantig]

A safari group is hiking through the jungle when they hear drums playing in the distance. After a few minutes, the drums stop and the native guides begin to murmur in a worried fashion. The men who organized the safari look at them in confusion. The drums resume, and things go back to normal. A few minutes later, the drums start again, and the natives get more fearful. The drums resume, normality returns until the drums stop again and the natives are in almost full-blown panic.

The leader of the hunters grabs the leader of the guide and says, “Why do your people get so worked up when the drums stop?”

The native says, “Oh, sir - when the drums stop, very bad.”

The hunter says, “What’s so bad about when the drums stop.”

The native says, “When the drums stop, bass solo next.”

 

[gush]

How do you know when a drummer is at your door?

The knocking speeds up and slows down and he never knows when to come in.

 

[gush]

How do you get a guitar player to stop playing?

Hand him sheet music.

 

[Clashcityrocker]

How did they get R. Kelly to surrender himself to authorities?



They told him he would be staying at a female juvenile detention center.

 

[IKnowALittle]

This made me LOL. Thx.