The Eyeball Test.

[László]

Last night was the Lions failing the eye test.

But today is actually National Eyeball Day. Wait, it isn't for you?

Well, it is for me, because I can finally cross 'cataract surgery' off my bucket list of Things I'd Rather Put Off But Need Doing! Yes, I had Cataract Surgery Round Two, getting the second eye done at 6AM today.

I was the first patient on the hit parade in the OR. It was fast. I was home by 8 AM.

6AM isn't my cuppa meat. I'm no morning person. But the less time I have to spend in operating rooms, the better my day goes.

I feel really good! No pain to speak of, the eye feels more like I rubbed it too hard, or it's just dry. If I wasn't wearing a clear plastic patch over it, I'd hardly know anything was done.

Most people have a bucket list of things they want to do in life. Not me. Mine is a bucket list of Things I'd Much Rather Put Off, But Need Doing!

Speaking of the Lions, the eye surgeon and anesthesiologist were talking about the NFC championship game; the eye surgeon was disappointed that they lost, the anesthesiologist took the points and the Lions and doubled his money. He was pretty chipper. I would be too, but I rarely place bets.

Since The Curse of Bobby Layne doesn't affect eyeballs, I'm fine with the Lions loss. Everyone here in Hell will be happy that the curse stayed intact.

It's the obligation of every Lions team to blow a lead in a big game, a requirement. Keeps people in Michigan humble.

"Are you humble, Laz?"

"No, because I'm not in Detroit, I'm in hell. But if I WAS in Detroit, I'd be a doormat today."

"Yeah, but a you'd be a doormat with one less thing to check off the bucket list!"

 

[bodia]

Congrats on having two good eyes again!

 

[ViperDoc]

Go Niners, babyyyyyyy!!!

Although it would have been cool to see Detroit in the Super Bowl. But that’s what happens when you should have kicked the field goal and goose egged the third quarter.

 

[Tedder]

My wife is legally blind. One of her eyes is fairly bad but the other is terrible. Sadly for her, she was born with the really bad eye and the docs says that it's a risky procedure to remove the cataract because of what it's connected to/where it is located. Because she was born with it, her brain wouldn't adjust to being able to see light anyway.

Really glad to hear that you are getting that taken care of! That's a big deal!

(I also have a bucket list of things I need to get done, but don't want to deal with)

 

[Juan Luis Vidal]

Congrats on recovering the eye!

I went through Lasik surgery years ago, and it has been the best investment ever...that moment you realize you are able to see again without glasses...no words can describe it!

 

[FragileThunder]

I already used up my Johnny Nash YouTube on you last week, so I'll just go with I'm happy you can see clearly now.

 

[Greywolf]

They had a GREAT first half! Then after they started playing Grateful Dead on the TV breaks .. the 9ers came alive . They'll be back , good coach , good team

 

[dmatthews]

Great to hear you are on the down slope of this one!

 

[Going Modal]

Go Niners, babyyyyyyy!!!

Although it would have been cool to see Detroit in the Super Bowl. But that’s what happens when you should have kicked the field goal and goose egged the third quarter.

Well hey, have fun watching your Super Bowl while the camera keeps cutting to Taylor Swift after every play that Kelce is involved in. Geez Louise, can we stop with it already? I'm sure there's lots of long-time fans cheering their heads off who'd love to be on television, too...

 

[alantig]

Well hey, have fun watching your Super Bowl while the camera keeps cutting to Taylor Swift after every play that Kelce is involved in. Geez Louise, can we stop with it already? I'm sure there's lots of long-time fans cheering their heads off who'd love to be on television, too...

And maybe they would be if they were the biggest pop star in the world.

I read something today that said the NFL has seen a growth of over $331M because of Taylor Swift. She's getting young people to watch the games (even if it's not for the games), and some percentage of them will become football fans. This does nothing but help the NFL. I even heard someone say they should get rid of the Slime Cast thing they do and do a Taylor Cam version - show just her during the game. This person guessed it would kill the ratings and revenue the Slime Cast brings in.

And just about every sport and/or network does the celebrity highlight thing, and yes, it can be annoying. But as long as it benefits them, they'll keep doing it.

The real issue isn't that they show these people, it's that the game has moved on from our generations (yes, I'm making an assumption here). I've seen a lot of complaints about how players behave, and what it usually comes down to is "Why can't these people born in the 1990s/2000s behave like the ones born in the 1950s/60s/70s?"

 

[László]

Go Niners, babyyyyyyy!!!

Although it would have been cool to see Detroit in the Super Bowl. But that’s what happens when you should have kicked the field goal and goose egged the third quarter.

I turned the game off at 24-24. I was confident that The Curse of Bobby Layne was on. I've seen it in operation too many times to lose my belief in it.

Nothing's more interesting than seeing a good curse in operation. Sometimes The Curse breaks an important player's leg, or causes a QB to think the other team is his team, and throw the ball to the wrong side. But last night the curse outdid itself.

You see, for this game The Curse put a little device into Dan Campbell's head at halftime and turned his brain into a donkey's brain - we saw him double down on stupid. It was inspiring.

They should have gone for the TD with 4th and goal in the second quarter, but kicked a field goal. They should have kicked the field goal when they needed points in the third quarter but went for it on fourth down. Hell, they should have stuck with the run game, it was working and SF couldn't stop them.

Shoulda, woulda, coulda!

But that would have spoiled the fun of The Curse!

For a Curse connoisseur such as yours truly, it was awesome to behold The Curse's grip on what then passed for Dan Campbell's brain.

I don't know about you, but I'd hate to see an important tradition simply disappear after 67 years of seeing an entire town beating its head against a wall in an annual rite of futility!

It's a meaningful Lions tradition to blow a lead in a big game, it's their Karma. I personally can't think of any reason to monkey with that kind of transformation merely to watch another football game, which is all the Super Duper Bowl is; just another football game whose function is to serve as a platform for clever commercials, and facilitate the sale of beer, chili dogs, pizza and potato chips. Did I mention beer?

So Iturned off the TV, and went into the studio. It was much more satisfying!

My brother and son were texting me separately, and saying, "Are you watching?" I said no, I turned it off. "They're gonna come back," they both said.

"No they're not. They're the Lions."

My best college buddy is a Niners fan, and said, "They could come back, it's close."

"Nope," I said. "That would be a different team."

For as long as the game of professional football lasts, whether it's 100 or 1,000 years from now, the proud tradition of The Curse will follow the Lions like Mr. Mxlplx' cloud.

I got to my football final resting place when Michigan won themselves the National Championship of so-called "college" football (which we all know is really a professional sport at this point). Dayenu! It is enough!

To lose The Curse and its awesome hold over generations of professional athletes would be a greater loss than a mere game!

 

[László]

My wife is legally blind. One of her eyes is fairly bad but the other is terrible. Sadly for her, she was born with the really bad eye and the docs says that it's a risky procedure to remove the cataract because of what it's connected to/where it is located. Because she was born with it, her brain wouldn't adjust to being able to see light anyway.

Really glad to hear that you are getting that taken care of! That's a big deal!

(I also have a bucket list of things I need to get done, but don't want to deal with)

Your poor wife! That's a shame!

Though my wife would be happy if she didn't have to see me every day, so there's that.

 

[ViperDoc]

Well hey, have fun watching your Super Bowl while the camera keeps cutting to Taylor Swift after every play that Kelce is involved in. Geez Louise, can we stop with it already? I'm sure there's lots of long-time fans cheering their heads off who'd love to be on television, too...

I'm with you, but the sad truth is the NFL makes millions every time they show her on TV. She is a CASH MAGNET. They'd be fools not to milk it.

 

[László]

I'm with you, but the sad truth is the NFL makes millions every time they show her on TV. She is a CASH MAGNET. They'd be fools not to milk it.

I'd much rather look at Taylor Swift than Some Ugly Dude With His Face Painted And Wearing A Weird Costume, which is usually who they pan the camera to after a play.

I mean, seriously.

Remember when Lou Holtz coached Notre Dame, and the camera would follow him pounding along the sidelines after every play?

Yeah, give me Taylor Swift instead.

 

[Prina]

It's the obligation of every Lions team to blow a lead in a big game, a requirement. Keeps people in Michigan humble.

I'm sure the Wolverines winning the national championship helped a lot with humility also.

Glad to hear both eyes are working well. That surgery is on lots of our horizons.

 

[d4rkst4r]

Nice to hear you were able to have the vision issue successfully corrected. I've heard the results are amazing.

The Lions.....not quite the curse of Bobby Layne, but the curse of Dan Campbell. While the Lions shot themselves in the foot time and time again dropping passes, Campbell needs to know when to stop listening to the voices in his head and take the points instead of going for it on 4th down. They left six points out there, plus throwing more momentum to the '9ers favor. We know he's likes to do that, but know when to say when, that'll come from playoff experience. Everybody wanted to see the romanticized version of the playoffs continue, but that would have made for a bad Super Bowl.

Go '9ers until Steelers season begins again....

 

[andy474x]

Well, at least we have something to celebrate!!!

Your doc must not be the team eye doctor for the Lions… sounds like the second half actually went well!

 

[Bogner]

Yeah, give me Taylor Swift instead.

Eww...Say It Isn't So. Please Laz...Say It Isn't So!

 

[Tony M.]

Both eyes done and suddenly "The sky is blue." is no longer a metaphor.
Enjoy all the pretty colors Les. (I had mine done last year and it's amazing.)

I bet that purple guitar is a lot prettier now too.

 

[CandidPicker]

Congrats, Les,
Lasik is something I'd like to do when it needs doing, and according to my optometrist, my cataracts are only beginning and slow growing as of 10 years ago.

The standing joke when my Mom had hers done was that when Mom was in recovery, every 10 seconds, Mom would ask, "What time is it?" That got really old quite fast so I'd start making up time, "Half past a salt shaker," "Half past a milestone," Half past a fazzoole."

Mom was still groggy with the anesthesia and it was only her and me, so I've never told this story before. When your wife has hers done, you can have a laugh with my blessing...