This is the life I have been living for years.Well, if you're gigging Fridays and especially Saturdays, getting home at 2am isn't too big a deal. Depending on work situation, getting to the gig after work on a friday and setting up might be a little tight.
We practice Tuesdays, I get home by midnight at the latest (it's 45min away from me). Once a week isn't a big deal. We only gig on Fridays and Saturdays precisely because we all have day jobs, we are doing this for the love of it and the fun. If it's not fun, there's no point. If you keep it light, keep it fun, a band can easily co-exist with a day job. Progress might be a little slower, but who's in a hurry? Just lay down one ground rule: if it starts getting stressful, you're out. Period. Keep it light and fun. Life is too short for any more drama, especially at our age (I am 54).
BTW my wife is also a big supporter of the project. We even went on a vacation trip to Key West together- the whole band and our significant others. Great time.
One band I was in within the somewhat recent past, we had an 8 month run where we were playing every Friday and Saturday night with a few Thursdays thrown in there. That wore me out. Friday really sucks when you have a Thursday gig. I would be up late Thursday night due to playing. Thankfully the place that gig was always at was closer to my home and we didn't have to tear down at the end of the night because it is a 3 night gig. However, getting up at 6 AM after being up until 1 or 2 AM and then working all day to run out of work right at 5 to get ready for Friday night to then be up until around 3 AM gets old really fast. Then do it all again on Saturday after sleeping away half of Saturday. I felt like all I ever did was work and gig.
I also typically end up being the guy that does more than anyone else in the band. I own the PA so I have all of that work to do too. In the bands that I have run, which seems to be most of them, I don't tolerate drama. I have heard many times how much fun my bands are to be in and how there is no drama to deal with in them. I will take someone that is a mediocre player over a drama queen that is really freaking good at what they do. I am probably going to start looking for a laid back playing situation. I really only want to gig a couple of times a month and could be okay with getting together once a week for practice and jam time. I typically learn everything at home then rehearsal is truly a rehearsal and we only have to make decisions on starting and ending songs.