- Jan 24, 2022
Feeling the exact same way. Divorced all my siblings. Just had to get rid of some of the toxicity in my life.The older I get, the more I realize that what my parents weren't and didn't teach me has shaped me more than what they did. This is especially true now that I'm a father.
I don't speak to my parents anymore. Haven't in over a decade, since my mother's bad behavior surrounding my wedding. The drama and conflict that she thrives on no longer has a place in my life. I wish I'd realized how toxic things were earlier and dealt with them sooner.
Mostly it's that my parents aren't--in my mind--fully-formed people. There's a depth that isn't there. I grew up being told what not to do, which isn't how I'm choosing to do things with my son. The number of "real" conversations I had with my parents was almost zip. They're nice people at a surface level, but there's nothing below that. Lives not fully lived or developed. It's just not who they are.