Downers Grove IL.- After an "epic" day at the pool, Sergio de Blanc returns to find the final piece missing from his latest project guitar in the mail. Excited at the prospect of finally finishing it, he became distraught upon stringing it up that one of the winged tuners suffered from the dreaded "string slippage" he had heard so much about but had never experienced first hand. "I felt as though I was punched in the fruit-basket" he was quoted as saying; "I had already had to modify a thumbscrew to make these work, now I fear I'm gonna have to the same to the tuner itself... It seems as though the gear inside is wonky, or something." While the man has faced ridicule in the past for his favor of winged tuners, and even once publicly heckled by a ranking employee at the PRS Guitar company as being part of the "Flat Earth Society" he remains hopeful: "It's not the end of the world...Yet!" he muttered while making a stiff fruity alcoholic beverage known as the "Down-n-out-in Beverly Hills" (equal parts Moet champagne and Hawaiian Fruit Punch) "The thing is, these were some goofy-assed square backed tuners obviously made by some fly-by-night American manufacturer. They are not indicative of the quality I have come to expect from the German-made Schaller sourced ones. There is no doubt in my mind that must have been the reason why PRS stopped using them." When lightly and romantically probed by this reporter as to whether or not this marked the end of his appreciation of winged tuners he replied; "Of course not! I have others.. Just not another square backed one, and this is seriously [email protected] up my aesthetic." When reached for comment, the SWARP Foundations phone line seemed to have been cut, or at least out of service. All attempts at phoning resulted in a busy signal, kinda like when you try calling your own phone number from your own phone.