My Fort Is A Moving Target Because Lesteban Is Crazy.

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Too Many Notes
Joined
Apr 26, 2012
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Location
Michigan
Dear Abby:

I'm Les, and I have a problem. My alter-ego, Lesteban, is nuts.

I get my amps all set up the way I like them, and Lesteban thinks they should be set up a different way. So we do that. Then I think they were best the way I had them set up in the first place, and switch them back.

Lesteban won't sit still, of course, and finds yet another way to set everything up.

But I think that way doesn't work, because I can't get around to the back of the amps easily to make switching or settings changes, move them to a different place where I can get behind them easily.

Then he finds a place in the room where things look fine, but it's too boomy for recording. I find a different spot where it sounds better, but looks really crappy and takes up too much space in the room. He objects, of course.

I will play only PRS amps, and Lesteban seems to like Mesas, even though the PRS amps clearly sound better. To top everything else off, we have different tastes in microphones, and I am NOT happy with his session work, because he overplays.

He and I are at a complete impasse. I don't like him, he doesn't like me.

He is a very difficult brain-mate.

I never should have let him come and live in my brain back in the summer of 1970, but he was a homeless hippie, and I was a college student and felt sorry for him...

I'm writing to ask what I can do to get rid of him in a tactful way? I don't want to have to shoot him because of the mess it would cause in my half of my head.

Restless in Detroit
 
Set the amps the way you like them, booted it in a way that Lesteban thinks it's his idea.

It used to work on my ex...


no wait...She would shoot down my idea, then come up with the same idea herself (or hear it from someone else) and think it was a great idea... that's the same as my advice, isn't it??:eek:
 
Set the amps the way you like them, booted it in a way that Lesteban thinks it's his idea.

It used to work on my ex...


no wait...She would shoot down my idea, then come up with the same idea herself (or hear it from someone else) and think it was a great idea... that's the same as my advice, isn't it??:eek:

I want Lesteban to be my ex...

Seriously, though, I want to set up the amps so they're easy to use, but don't have to be set up and taken down every time I bring in a session player with a different amp, or a singer, or whatever.

So I keep moving them around, and finding different setups, only to discover once I get all that done, that I shouldn't have bothered.

I blame Lesteban, but honestly, I'm just too old to move amps around. Right now they're smack in the middle of the room, where they sound best, and are easiest to hear nuances from my workstation when I take the cans off, and they look like hell and I have to move them when I do other sessions.

One amp, sure, fine, no problem. Three amps? Too much work.

Yet I need them all. Sigh. Oh well, back to moving amps around...
 
I know you use the isolation platforms...is it possible to put wheels on them and not lose the isolation? At least then you wouldn't be lifting them all the time...
 
Dear Restless in Detroit,
When I want to get rid of my man, I usually cook a large 7 course meal with plenty of something carbonated (bubbly, beer, tonic, soda -- doesn't matter) then immediately try to have sex with him after. If he throws up before we get our clothes off, I know I might get one more text from this guy.
I'm not sure why I just shared that, it doesn't really help you.
Perhaps seek professional help, as you don't really have a split personality, and are trying to blame someone else for something you are doing to yourself. Take responsibility for your own actions!
Sincerely, Abby
 
This is a common problem caused by the early 70s due mainly through running around with no clothes on during the end of the 60s with flowers in the hair under the influence of a Lucy and discovering the road to prog rock. the cure is as follows.
Hire someone to place your equipment where you would like it who is completely impartial.
This person should reside in the UK somewhere just about where I live.:p
If all else fails man up and bite that bottom lip!!!
 
I know you use the isolation platforms...is it possible to put wheels on them and not lose the isolation? At least then you wouldn't be lifting them all the time...

I could put them on top of wheeled caster boards. That's a good idea.
 
Dear Restless in Detroit,
When I want to get rid of my man, I usually cook a large 7 course meal with plenty of something carbonated (bubbly, beer, tonic, soda -- doesn't matter) then immediately try to have sex with him after. If he throws up before we get our clothes off, I know I might get one more text from this guy.
I'm not sure why I just shared that, it doesn't really help you.
Perhaps seek professional help, as you don't really have a split personality, and are trying to blame someone else for something you are doing to yourself. Take responsibility for your own actions!
Sincerely, Abby

Aw, Abby. You got Lesteban all mad.
 
This is a common problem caused by the early 70s due mainly through running around with no clothes on during the end of the 60s with flowers in the hair under the influence of a Lucy and discovering the road to prog rock.

I really did like ELP and Yes...

I won't comment too much on my being naked with flowers in hair, as I tried to do that as often as possible with the opposite sex...but back then, sex was kind of a big deal. :)

Now of course, kids get bored with it in elementary school. :eek:
 
Put markers/tape/etc on the floor when you have the amps in the spots where they sound the best for recording, and mark an extra spot for guys who bring their own amp.

This could make all of the "looks good" issues subside due to the visual cue that "THIS SPOT, right here, is where my amp sounds the best." Not only for you, but your clients/players! They'll see the tape and think, "This Les guy really went through the effort to figure out exactly where each amp sounded the best in this room! Whoa! And he even has a spot for my amp, where it should sound the best?!?! Awesome!"

As long as your cable runs are neat/hidden, you'll appear to be a genius.

* the above is purely hypothetical *
 
Perhaps the following short stories might help...

Story #1
Five monkeys went into a room.

Story #2
Eddie couldn't find the bottle opener.

Story #3
The sky was the color of a raspberry Slurpie.

Story #4
A low humming noise was coming from the next room.

Story #5
A chicken squawked in pain and pride as it laid an enormous egg.
 
I'd gladly trade my amp/room problems with yours. I have a PRS Custom 50/PRS 2x12, Mesa Boogie Mark V/ 2x12 Vertical recto cab, Mesa Mini Rec, Mesa Mark V25, 4 other 1x12 cabinets, bookshelves full of CDs, albums and other music stuff, a compluter/recording desk, and about 15 guitars. All in one 12x11 room.

Lestoban feel better yet in his 30' cavern?
 
Aw, Abby. You got Lesteban all mad.
Dear Lesteban,
I find people like Restless respond to stress by discussing the technical side of music making. Perhaps you should try just listening to him. But be forewarned, he's very smart, he may convince you that his way is superior.
Sincerely, Abby

Dear RiD,
I just bought an AC30, where's the best place to mic it? Should I put it up on an amp stand, or on the ground? Does it matter? For recording, should I switch to a single speaker combo like the AC15? Or perhaps just mic it on the outside of one of the speakers?
I know this may seem like we're discussing my problem, not yours, but trust me...
Sincerely, Abby

Dear Lesteban,
That should keep him busy.
Sincerely, Abby
 
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Dear RiD,
I just bought an AC30, where's the best place to mic it?

In the butt, Bob. ;)

OK, you have to move the mic around in front of one of the speakers to find the spot where you like the tone.

Though some guys do like to put a mic in the...uh...rear of the speaker. :eek:

I don't. Too many phase issues if you're also miking the front.

Should I put it up on an amp stand, or on the ground? Does it matter?

It matters, and put it on an amp stand if possible.

For recording, should I switch to a single speaker combo like the AC15? Or perhaps just mic it on the outside of one of the speakers?y

You should record both an AC30 and an AC15, of course! Otherwise, how will you know? :)
 
So today my little production company started an Instagram page, and our intern found an old shot of a session with Laurie Wisefield (Clapton, Joe Cocker, Wishbone Ash, others) and posted it as Throwback Thursday.

Nice old Marshall head in the shot (JTM45 if I remember right). Head in control room, cab in fort in tracking room. And a Strat. I took the pic, so I'm not in it.

The funny part is that I am so bad at this stuff that I had to hire someone to handle it. That's how past it I am...

https://www.instagram.com/elfxiaudioartistry/

Oh, you're wondering what this has to do with my Fort?

Nothing, really, except that I liked having heads in control rooms and cabs in tracking rooms because it is so much easier to know what everything sounds like through the monitors that way. So it's tangentially related, somehow. Maybe.
 
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