Moments of Doubt and Pain

[László]

After 30 years in the music business doing paid, client-ordered soundtrack work, I decided to release some tunes that reflect how I hear music, without client input. I figured after years and years of talk, it was time to do it.

This isn’t about promoting it; very few people here would bother to listen to it twice; it’s not guitar music, and it’s not a popular genre. Unless you’re into electronica and film scores, believe me, you’ll hate it. Hell, I kinda hate it, and I wrote and recorded it!

Being a somewhat sensible person, I have to say that putting out an album is daunting. I hesitated to do this several times. My head was full of potential reactions, like, “This sucks.” I won’t kid myself.

A few days ago, I decided not to bother. Then my son encouraged me, and basically said (I’m paraphrasing) that lots of artists can’t stand their own music after living with it for awhile. I am certainly among them. Yet I moved forward with it.

I don’t know if I’ll think this was a good idea or a bad idea in a few years, but at least it wasn’t expensive, since I have my own studio. I’m not encouraging anyone else to try this, but I guess it felt necessary.

I’m sitting here having a Monkey 47 martini in honor of my somehow coming up with the firmness of purpose to let it out there! Woo! Doubt, pain, goodbye.

 

[bodia]

There will be an audience for it somewhere out there. Heck, there's a whole sub genre of metal called Symphonic Metal, which is basically "Film Score Metal". There's a sizable audience for it. Who knew?! Not saying I'm into it, or not. It won't be your kind of thing, just trying to draw a comparison to what people may like.

I haven't commented because I have not listened to it all. I could listen to while working, or walking the dog. Not typically my kind of music, but it has merit.

Put the damn thing out so I can spend some money, and support a friend!

I lift my glass of 47 to the east. Cheers, my friend!

 

[Screamingdaisy]

I joke to my friends that I wouldn’t buy my own album. I more proud of the live shows than I am of the record.

 

[Wakester]

As long as you didn't write the Charmin Toilet Paper jingles, I'll listen to it. Where's the link?, when's the release party? Who do I have to off to get you a gold record? FWIW, I used to listen to Howard Jones, you can't get much more Electronica Movie Score than that.

 

[sergiodeblanc]

Generally, I’ve hated all my records until a few years pass and a new one comes out for me to focus all my negative energy on.

 

[Boogie]

Thanks for the tip of Monkey 47, though I haven’t bought it yet (my local pusher ordered some in for me) because I will wait to listen to your work when I have the appropriate libation to toast it. Seems appropriate. You also seem like a total WEENIE. Release it...dammit...you’re among friends that will like it because it’s an extension of your art and that’s a portal into the person. Of which, you’ll never be comfortable revealing. I get it.

Don’t ever ask me to be sappy again. I think I need a shower. At least a damned good martini. And for that I thank you.

 

[bodia]

Thanks for the tip of Monkey 47, though I haven’t bought it yet (my local pusher ordered some in for me) because I will wait to listen to your work when I have the appropriate libation to toast it. Seems appropriate. You also seem like a total WEENIE. Release it...dammit...you’re among friends that will like it because it’s an extension of your art and that’s a portal into the person. Of which, you’ll never be comfortable revealing. I get it.

Don’t ever ask me to be sappy again. I think I need a shower. At least a damned good martini. And for that I thank you.

Careful Boogs, too much of the 47 could lead to premature Santana!

 

[Reynewan]

After 30 years in the music business doing paid, client-ordered soundtrack work, I decided to release some tunes that reflect how I hear music, without client input. I figured after years and years of talk, it was time to do it.

This isn’t about promoting it; very few people here would bother to listen to it twice; it’s not guitar music, and it’s not a popular genre. Unless you’re into electronica and film scores, believe me, you’ll hate it. Hell, I kinda hate it, and I wrote and recorded it!

Being a somewhat sensible person, I have to say that putting out an album is daunting. I hesitated to do this several times. My head was full of potential reactions, like, “This sucks.” I won’t kid myself.

A few days ago, I decided not to bother. Then my son encouraged me, and basically said (I’m paraphrasing) that lots of artists can’t stand their own music after living with it for awhile. I am certainly among them. Yet I moved forward with it.

I don’t know if I’ll think this was a good idea or a bad idea in a few years, but at least it wasn’t expensive, since I have my own studio. I’m not encouraging anyone else to try this, but I guess it felt necessary.

I’m sitting here having a Monkey 47 martini in honor of my somehow coming up with the firmness of purpose to let it out there! Woo! Doubt, pain, goodbye.

Well, all I can reply to your post is that I have a big respect to anyone who as a true musician still works in the music business in the year 2019. The times are rough and tough in the business. The music industry is partly dead. What I want to say is: It´s about compromises. True compromises always hurt.
The producer, who did my first record many years ago, loved to produce and listen to guitar orientated music. Of course, he was a guitar player as well.
But for the economic survival of his studio, he recorded radio jingles and did also live soundmixing for some embarrassing acts. But he did that all
not only to pay his rent but also to being able to live on his dream with his own studio and music making as to satisfy himself with his private musical aims.

Besides this: There allegedly bands hating their music, because they have to write and record the same record over and over again.
Otherwise their loyal fans will punish them hard. That´s a partly closemouthed issue in the Heavy Metal scene..

 

[sergiodeblanc]

Careful Boogs, too much of the 47 could lead to premature Santana!

Oh, is that what happened to us?

 

[bodia]

Oh, is that what happened to us?

Most def!

 

[WEDGE]

Free it, let it loose on the world.

 

[veinbuster]

I haven’t found Monkey 47 yet, but I’m toasting with my Eau Claire Parlor Gin.

I was lucky enough to listen and thought it was good enough to listen to some more. Well done Les.

 

[László]

Oh, guys, I did upload it for release and distribution to who-knows-where! Just waiting for the confirmation of approval email.

That’s why I’m having a second drink! Party’s on me! Now that I’ve more or less let go of the project, I can breathe again.

I should mention that I got some feedback and encouragement from a few of my pals here, and for that I’m forever grateful. The friends I’ve made here are awesome.

You also seem like a total WEENIE.

‘Total weenie’ is a very apt description of my so-called personality. But you already knew that!

 

[László]

As long as you didn't write the Charmin Toilet Paper jingles, I'll listen to it. Where's the link?, when's the release party? Who do I have to off to get you a gold record? FWIW, I used to listen to Howard Jones, you can't get much more Electronica Movie Score than that.

If only I’d done Charmin Toilet Paper jingles! I’d never turn down national ad work! Never have, never will. Broadcast royalties have been a chunk of my earnings.

As to the record, there’s no link now. I just wanted to share my relief at having finally accomplished a goal in this thread.

 

[László]

Well, all I can reply to your post is that I have a big respect to anyone who as a true musician still works in the music business in the year 2019. The times are rough and tough in the business. The music industry is partly dead. What I want to say is: It´s about compromises. True compromises always hurt.
The producer, who did my first record many years ago, loved to produce and listen to guitar orientated music. Of course, he was a guitar player as well.
But for the economic survival of his studio, he recorded radio jingles and did also live soundmixing for some embarrassing acts. But he did that all
not only to pay his rent but also to being able to live on his dream with his own studio and music making as to satisfy himself with his private musical aims.

Besides this: There allegedly bands hating their music, because they have to write and record the same record over and over again.
Otherwise their loyal fans will punish them hard. That´s a partly closemouthed issue in the Heavy Metal scene..

I hear you loud and clear, but I’ve been really, really lucky to do lots of national ads for Fortune 500 companies over a long period, some TV, film, and venue work, and projects like Disney World and international auto shows.

I got into the music business at 38, long after most folks take the leap. I knew right away that being a rock star was out, and the world of advertising was going to be my main market. So I started with what most folks would think was a compromise. However, I love doing ad work. Seriously, it’s great fun, the people are super-great to deal with, and heck, it’s been my professional life for a long time.

I even was crazy enough to encourage my son to get into it, and he’s achieved good success in LA, in a band, as well as producing, and writing. He’s earned a couple of gold records along the way. So it’s not impossible.

But yes, it is not easy by any means, and it’s true that budgets have shrunk.

In the case of the forthcoming album, it’s more a labor of love than a realistic vehicle for sales. I have no expectations for it other than I wanted to do it.

 

[Boogie]

Careful Boogs, too much of the 47 could lead to premature Santana!

There is no way ANY Santana would be premature for me.

 

[alantig]

I was not prepared for this. I thought there’d be a delay until the Spandex came in for the cover photo.

 

[Tonart]

Go for it! YOLO!

 

[Serious Poo]

Les, I used to be terrified of what others would think of my music. But, fortunately, two events happened within a couple of days of each other that completely gave me a different view of life, the universe and everything. First, I heard songs from the velvet underground. Holy crap, they sucked. To me. I meant they really really really sucked. To me. I lean towards some twisted blend of shoegazer meets prog metal meets brit pop, so YMMV. But hey, I immediately thought that if these folks can record, get recognized, build up a fan base, and even receive critical acclaim from others, then anything I can create or perform has simply got to be good enough. Better, even. That was over 20 years ago and I still don’t like velvet underground.

A couple of days later read a quote that sticks with me to this day: “what a boring place it would be if only the best birds sang”. I have no idea why, but that quote hit me like a freight train.

So... I pretty much overcame stage fright and performance anxiety immediately afterwards and went on to play in a bunch of horrible bands you’ve never heard of, utterly convinced that we played better music than velvet underground ever did.



Best of luck to you, Les!

 

[vchizzle]

Happy you decided to make the leap! It is a relief when all the decision making is done, that’s for certain. Can’t wait for the release. Congrats!