Because the old 'tone is in the hands' saw isn't true.
Tone is a process that is limited by the capabilities of the instrument. It is initiated by the hands, and modulated by the brain, but the instrument can only respond to the input as far as its capabilities allow it to respond. An instrument will always impose its limitations, no matter what your hands do. And it will always reveal its sonic character.
The better the instrument, the more the human being can do with it, and the fewer limitations are imposed on the hands in terms of what they can do. The instrument filters what's coming from your hands and intentions, and responds within its fixed limitations. It facilitates certain things; it imposes roadblocks on other things.
That's why folks who take guitar seriously will spend whatever it takes to have an instrument that can respond to their input in the ways they want. So sure, you're gonna sound like you in certain ways. On the other hand, the instrument has a lot to say about how you sound, how easy it is to achieve your sound, the nuances of your sound, and a zillion other things, like frequency emphasis and response, resonance, sustain, warmth, brightness, etc.
A great instrument allows you to sound like you, only different than you sound on a less-than-great instrument. Just as your hands inevitably produce different tones on a jazz box, a Les Paul, a PRS, and a Strat (or anything else), they'll produce different tones on a finer instrument. Just the way it is. The instrument imposes its limitations and character.
At a certain price point, the law of diminishing returns kicks in, and you pay a lot for smaller improvements, but of course, it's those tiny nuances that can make all the difference for some players, and yet not be very important for others.
Yes, I realize you were kidding around, of course! Nonetheless, it made me think!