It’s official…

[Lola]

I know who to call and it ain’t Ghostbusters! Lol

 

[bodia]

I thought I was the only one that was affected by my wife being home. She works from home a couple of days a week every other week. She is here every evening and weekend. She doesn't really have any hobbies that get her out of the house, except the occasional shopping trip, which just blows money and adds more stuff to the house we don't really need. Thankfully she doesn't do it very often and she is a frugal shopper. She is always telling me to do what I want. She tells me to play when I want and to get out on my motorcycle and ride. For whatever reason when she is here I feel like I can't really do those things. I am not sure why but it does deter me.

Yeah, I never really thought about how my day would change. I was (and still am) all for her retiring a couple of years early. She was beyond miserable at work. Mostly with co-workers/bosses, not so much the work. It was weird. She worked for one of the local utility companies in specialized billing/auditing. Half of her team were union employees, and the other half were not. Hourly vs. Salary. Work habits, and mgmt not wanting to "ruffle any feathers", blah, blah, blah.

Anyway, the alarm used to go off at 4 AM so she could be in the office by 6, and she'd be done at 3. I've been full time from home since 2007. That meant I was online working before 5 every morning, and stopped around 5 every afternoon. That left plenty of time during the day where I didn't feel guilty running errands, playing guitar, watching a dvd, or taking a nap. Now, there is no alarm. We get up when the pooch says it's time. Usually around 6. That means I'm online by 6:30 and sign off at 4:30. We never talked about it, but I always figured she get a part time job (paid or not), or volunteer at some animal shelter. Just didn't think she'd be at home all day. She took the first year to tend to things around the house. Clean out, and donate, the clothes she's never going to wear again, etc. That started in April, 2019. Then, a year later, the world turned upside down, and she's been home every since. Don't get me wrong, I love her being around all day. Someone to talk to besides the dog. It's just that my routine is now shot. I have never been one to play when she (or the dogs) wandered into the room. Now, if I do something during the day it's like, "Shouldn't you be working?" Oh well, first world problem! I'll get over it.

 

[veinbuster]

Yeah, I never really thought about how my day would change. I was (and still am) all for her retiring a couple of years early. She was beyond miserable at work. Mostly with co-workers/bosses, not so much the work. It was weird. She worked for one of the local utility companies in specialized billing/auditing. Half of her team were union employees, and the other half were not. Hourly vs. Salary. Work habits, and mgmt not wanting to "ruffle any feathers", blah, blah, blah.

Anyway, the alarm used to go off at 4 AM so she could be in the office by 6, and she'd be done at 3. I've been full time from home since 2007. That meant I was online working before 5 every morning, and stopped around 5 every afternoon. That left plenty of time during the day where I didn't feel guilty running errands, playing guitar, watching a dvd, or taking a nap. Now, there is no alarm. We get up when the pooch says it's time. Usually around 6. That means I'm online by 6:30 and sign off at 4:30. We never talked about it, but I always figured she get a part time job (paid or not), or volunteer at some animal shelter. Just didn't think she'd be at home all day. She took the first year to tend to things around the house. Clean out, and donate, the clothes she's never going to wear again, etc. That started in April, 2019. Then, a year later, the world turned upside down, and she's been home ever since. Don't get me wrong, I love her being around all day. Someone to talk to besides the dog. It's just that my routine is now shot. I have never been one to play when she (or the dogs) wandered into the room. Now, if I do something during the day it's like, "Shouldn't you be working?" Oh well, first world problem! I'll get over it.

We did it the other way: I was the one who was suddenly home all the time. The first month, I went and road my bike a lot - like 30 hours a week. Then I helped build houses 2-3 days a week. Even when home, I mostly stayed out of her space except to offer her lunch, or a glass of wine.

She never minded me playing guitar, as long as I didn’t use the noisy channel - it didn’t agree with her brain.

 

[Mike J.]

This semi resonates with me but from a different angle.

I have no problem with playing just about every day. Fact is I'm taking a little break from working on church songs right now.

I'm now 70 (which may explain it) and I find myself wishing I could recapture the same magic, enthusiasm and wonderment of life when I was younger. Much younger. I'm not depressed and I am not suicidal. But some days I feel like the line in the John Mellencamp song where he sings "oh yeah life goes on, long after the thrill is living is gone."

Don't know, but maybe that feeling from my youth is a feeling that is reserved for youth when your're wide eyed, idealistic and just don't know any better. That sense of wonderment that I felt everyday. Where did it go? Too many knocks in life like we've all shared in one form or another? Or again, maybe being 70 has something to do with it. The fact that I'm that age doesn't bother me, but what's on my mind is "where the hell did 70 years go?" Blink of an eye!

Funny thing is, there have been times lately where I can feel those feelings from my youth and it's from some of the old songs from my youth. Had on the oldies station in my car last week and when certain songs came on the radio I felt like I was being transported to another time. I mean it, it stirred something within me and for a few brief moments I could feel it all again.

So it's not gone, but something got lost along the way and I'm wondering if it's possible to reclaim it again to some degree.

Or maybe I'm just being an old fool.

 

[Moondog Wily]

I think the current status of the world on many different levels is affecting many people's motivation factors. And I do not know how to shut that world out ;~(( One of the factors is of course the pandemic. Everybody fighting with each other does not help any! Prices on everything are squeezing the people to the point of bursting! And the music industry is slowly locking the door to new participants as the focus of the industry yet allowing everyone to participate with little to no pay (thank you streaming services).

I have been a musician since I was very young, and have always deemed music to be my religion. I however consciously chose to not pursue a career in music because of the game that the industry has been my entire life. As a result, I spent decades writing songs in my head and on paper, yet never developing/producing them. And I must say I was never motivated until 2021 to play other peoples music, until I did. Up until 2021, I could play "Tangled Up In Blue", "Blowin' In The Wind" and two of my own compositions. That was it. Now I have over 100 songs I can play at the drop of a hat and 100 more with some notes and it is a blast to do them MY WAY!

The past 2 years of my life have been a dream come true in terms of what I have accomplished musically, but I still struggle to get done what I want based on the co-habitation of the space in which I live (as many others have mentioned). My new compositions are coming to me faster and more frequent than at any time in my life (I think I have written about 10 songs in May so far, maybe more), but I do not have my own "studio". I do not have a remote location I can go to (or afford at this point) where balls to the wall is the sirens call. As a result, things are not getting done in the way or the amount that I would like. My girl tells me "you can play whenever you want", yet she will make passive aggressive comments to the cats about "Mommy does not like the noise either", so I read between the lines and when she walks in the door, I stop playing, at which point she will say "you don't need to stop playing" and I tell her I am ready to take a break. Now she does go out a LOT each day (and I work at home) with many groups of friends and participates in many different varieties of dance classes (sometimes as many as 3 in a single day), but I am a night person and I am not usually ready to really get into it (the music stuff) until the evening after dinner, that is my most motivated time musically. But my girl likes to go to bed early (10 pm or so, early by my standards) and so I usually have a few hours at best in the evening to do my thing, and even there, usually have to do that through headphones so as to not interfere with her space (very open architecture in this house). During the day (when she is often out of the house) I am more motivated to get "daylight hours" stuff done and generally am just not motivated to jump on the music bit.

Add to this that about 3 weeks ago, I was told my musical equipment can no longer stay set up, which means that every day, to set up and tear down my rig, I will be spending an hour on that process (half hour set up, half hour tear down and put away). On days where I have only an hour to play, too bad (or fiddle on an acoustic). This in part has resulted in me moving into production mode (rather than live performance practice mode, been ready to start recording for some time now though) to start pumping out some produced work, but this will be even worse because playing a song someone knows as opposed to recording individual components of a composition someone has never heard will increasingly limit my time to "get 'er done". I am fine playing songs in front of her or anyone else, but when working on a song and recording the individual parts, I don't feel anyone should have to suffer through that ;~))

So what do we do? I am active on 3 forums, this one, Fractal Audio forum and a relatively new one called "The Gear Forum". The last one was started by folk who were frustrated on "The Gear Page" and decided to start their own. One of the things that motivated me to join that forum was the "Do Something Challenge". It is a weekly "challenge" that tries to get people motivated to "do something" musically. There are no real prizes or awards, just pats on the back for participation and a motivation to get something done musically. I have only entered a couple of pieces, but now that I am in recording mode, will be entering a lot more. Jason E's thoughts about doing a video chat is awesome and I would love to participate if that gets rolling (do not expect to see my face though as I do not want to be responsible for cracking the screen on your device due to my hideous persona)! I also wish that forum members here were motivated to actually share their work and performances in the Studio & Stage section. I think more activity on this front would be a motivation factor for many and I am about to start polluting that space pretty heavily ;~))

Best wishes to all in finding the next step in the musical journey you are on ;~)) I was going to release an album this year, but have decided I am going instead for one hit single after another! First up will be "Garden Of Me" and I hope to release it on June 3 (next full moon)!

 

[ViperDoc]

I keep hearing about the importance of getting direct sunlight into your eyes every morning when you wake up. And I mean direct, not through a window. Get outside, breathe some air and let the sun shine on your face. It's supposed to set your circadian rhythm and trigger the release of endogenous (natural) dopamine, which makes you feel good. I'm going to try that tomorrow.

 

[Mrcairo46]

Dude,
Turn down the lights and crank up this song. put it on repeat for 8 times. turn lights back on and return here with your feelings.
MrCairo46

 

[Lola]

Feel somewhat relieved in knowing that I
am not the only one fighting this. Tonight right after we eat I have promised myself to learn all the chords to Peg (SD) It keeps me interested because some of the chords are so complex. I am getting a bit bored practicing my setlist for the beach. It’s fun but it’s not that interesting anymore because I can play all these songs with my eyes closed. I need a challenge to keep things interesting and me on task.

I think I am honestly starting to miss playing in a band but the BS, travel time etc. were just getting to be too much. I think come September I will try another shot at starting an all hometown female band. Who knows, it could be fun. There are some crazy woman players out there and I will find them. Birds of feather!

 

[Lola]

I keep hearing about the importance of getting direct sunlight into your eyes every morning when you wake up. And I mean direct, not through a window. Get outside, breathe some air and let the sun shine on your face. It's supposed to set your circadian rhythm and trigger the release of endogenous (natural) dopamine, which makes you feel good. I'm going to try that tomorrow.

I always feel better after an early morning walk with my dogs. I put on some tunes and then we walk even in the rain as they have raincoats, winter jackets, booties, hats etc. More clothes then me. I love walking and so do my fur babies.

 

[Lola]

Just ate while ago. Suppose to practice NOW but here I am watching a Jim Bruer comedy special and LMAO! I actually don’t even feel guilty because I am having a great time just laughing and feeling good but honestly a tad bit guilty if I stop and think about it.

 

[László]

Funny thing is, there have been times lately where I can feel those feelings from my youth and it's from some of the old songs from my youth. Had on the oldies station in my car last week and when certain songs came on the radio I felt like I was being transported to another time. I mean it, it stirred something within me and for a few brief moments I could feel it all again.

So it's not gone, but something got lost along the way and I'm wondering if it's possible to reclaim it again to some degree.

I do that, too, from time to time.

I think as life goes on, it's too easy for us to lose touch with the part of the inner self that makes life joyful. Life happens, years go by, we get farther away from it.

Lately I've been finding my way along an unexpected path. It's been - dare I say it - fun!

Even though I've always been a rocker at heart, I went down the rabbit hole of writing orchestral music. I started writing nearly every day. I listen to classical stuff in the car, and when I'm alone. Writing this style of music has given me a much better appreciation of classical and modern orchestral music from a different perspective.

I've connected with a different side of myself, one I never explored as a young person. That's pretty interesting - I don't feel I'm trying to recapture anything I lost, On the contrary, I feel like I'm discovering something new and exciting. There are days I feel 1000 years younger. Maybe even 10,000 years younger...

I guess what I'm trying to say is that trying something new can stimulate new pathways to creativity.

 

[Huggy Love]

I think I need to set up some kind of semi structured goals to accomplish something.

Maybe it's time to step back from the grind of gigging and performing, reset yourself, possibly focus on writing & composing.
Telling your own story through you own original recordings might be a good goal to refocus musically.

 

[vchizzle]

Maybe it's time to step back from the grind of gigging and performing, reset yourself, possibly focus on writing & composing.
Telling your own story through you own original recordings might be a good goal to refocus musically.

The band is all original music so that’s what I already do. I’m not a lead vocalist, my voice isn’t strong enough to do what I want to hear. I’m fine in a background vocal role.

 

[Lola]

So ppl name some different musical avenues to explore?

Something that I am enamoured with now is improvising. It’s pure fun and I get to do things that I create with my mind. It’s fascinating how my mind thinks. Brain functions particularly those of musicians are something that is worth exploring to me. I am not mindlessly playing notes that someone else has covered a million times before me. Not just ripping off a cover tune. I am capable of creativity and complexity when it comes right down to it. Musicians are NOT just your average Jane or Dick. Scientific data proves this point relentlessly.

Music-making engages both halves of the brain equally. By stimulating the left brain, which is the more mathematical, calculating and syntactic hemisphere, and the right, which is the more creative, musicians build a strong corpus callosum, which acts as a neural bridge between the two hemispheres.

 

[JasonE]

This semi resonates with me but from a different angle.

I have no problem with playing just about every day. Fact is I'm taking a little break from working on church songs right now.

I'm now 70 (which may explain it) and I find myself wishing I could recapture the same magic, enthusiasm and wonderment of life when I was younger. Much younger. I'm not depressed and I am not suicidal. But some days I feel like the line in the John Mellencamp song where he sings "oh yeah life goes on, long after the thrill is living is gone."

Don't know, but maybe that feeling from my youth is a feeling that is reserved for youth when your're wide eyed, idealistic and just don't know any better. That sense of wonderment that I felt everyday. Where did it go? Too many knocks in life like we've all shared in one form or another? Or again, maybe being 70 has something to do with it. The fact that I'm that age doesn't bother me, but what's on my mind is "where the hell did 70 years go?" Blink of an eye!

Funny thing is, there have been times lately where I can feel those feelings from my youth and it's from some of the old songs from my youth. Had on the oldies station in my car last week and when certain songs came on the radio I felt like I was being transported to another time. I mean it, it stirred something within me and for a few brief moments I could feel it all again.

So it's not gone, but something got lost along the way and I'm wondering if it's possible to reclaim it again to some degree.

Or maybe I'm just being an old fool.

I am more than a decade younger than you are and I have experienced this a number of times. It could be that both of my parents passed a young ages and I have outlived both of them. I occasionally get into the thought that I have accomplished a lot in my life and some days I am just tired of striving for more. I guess that means I am ready to retire, possibly. I am not old enough or rich enough to do that. I usually end up in the strange place where I am not ready to meet my maker yet but if it happened tomorrow, I feel like I have succeeded at this thing we call life. Those feelings that come from my youth do feel good and give me a little motivation.

 

[CVS]

Just finished reading all these posts. And I thought I was alone when this "stuff" happens. Right now I am not in this space and if anything I have to many things on my music to do list and need to "get real" about what I can accomplish in what time frame. When I become dis interested in playing, I have found that I have to introduce something new, it can be learning a new song (SIGNE Eric Clapton with Bossa Nova feel) or working on a new / improved technique (working on funk rhythms - which are needed for smooth jazz in many cases). Anything to get myself interested in playing. I am in my late 60's and looking back at my musical journey has led me from wanting to play solos most the time to song construction and groove / rhythm parts. I am using a DAW to put instruments I cannot play into songs. As long as I am learning, then I am in a good place and have a reason to get out of bed everyday.

 

[CVS]

Get Outside And Get Some Sunlight. Put Your Bare Feet In Some Dirt Or Grass And Get Yourself Recharged (Literally). Disconnect From Everything That Is Going On In The World And Don't Worry About Playing/Gear Or Anything. The Pendulum Will Always Swing Back Around. Trying To Force Things Usually Doesn't Work Or Work As Well As We Would Like. Let It Be...When Things Are Right It Will Happen.

This Has Always Worked For Me. I Hope It Helps You Also.

This works for me as well!

 

[Mike J.]

I am more than a decade younger than you are and I have experienced this a number of times. It could be that both of my parents passed a young ages and I have outlived both of them. I occasionally get into the thought that I have accomplished a lot in my life and some days I am just tired of striving for more. I guess that means I am ready to retire, possibly. I am not old enough or rich enough to do that. I usually end up in the strange place where I am not ready to meet my maker yet but if it happened tomorrow, I feel like I have succeeded at this thing we call life. Those feelings that come from my youth do feel good and give me a little motivation.

Jason, same here with both my parents. Dad passed in 2016 and mom in 2021. They're in my thoughts everyday but prior to my turning 70 this past March is when the reality of how fast it's all going by really hit me and hard. I was a wreck but once my birthday came and went I felt like I jumped over a big hurdle and I've come to terms with a lot of things.

One good thing (for me) about getting older is that you become more settled about certain things. What was once so important doesn't seem to really matter now in the grand scheme of things. But at the same time there is a certain "urgency" but it's not necessarily a desperate "gnawing in the pit of your stomach" urgency if that mackes any sense at all. This world is in such a bad place and I find I'm trying to run as far away from it as far as I can. I think that's part reason why I'm trying to find that youthful hope again. Right now the big hope within is to try and be a good, kind, decent and thoughtful Christian man. That and taking stock with lifes simple offerings and not trying to keep up with the Joneses.

One thing I am all out for is do be the absolute best I can when I play at church. Reason being: I'm serving the Creator of the universe and it's my way of saying thank you for all He's done for me. I'm not rich by any means and for the most part I'm living off my social security. But God's been good to me and He's given me what I need. Can't ask for more than that.

Retirement has worked out good for me. (Sleeping in is wonderul!!). My original plan was to work until I was 68 but I got let go from my job (contract worker) when the virus came to town. So I retired when I was 67 in March of 2020. Again, didn't quite get what I wanted but I got what I needed. Didn't want to work that long but because of the many setbacks I encountered during my working years I had to keep going. So I'm very fortunate in that sense.

So in the meantime I'm taking each day as it comes, trying to move forward while trying to find that spark from my youth. As I said, it's there but right now it only makes "guest apperances" from time to time. But man, it sure feels good when it comes and stays for a few.

 

[ScottR]

I feel ya bro. Just know you’re not alone.

I still make myself grab a guitar every day, even if it’s just to noodle for 5 or 10 minutes. I keep one where I can see it no matter where I am in the house except when I sleep. My wife and I are dealing with some bad stuff at the moment, and it’s hard to focus on anything but that lately.


That being said, it always makes me feel better if I can get that serotonin dump even if it’s for just a few minutes. But I have days where my heart just isn’t into it. I think that’s something we all go thru, but as with most things…I do my best to throw myself into it, like it or not and it helps just knowing I am still 100% committed to it because it’s my passion.

I know you can probably play anything, but for me it’s a major challenge learning stuff and that can be hard as hell (for me to learn) and I do my best to perfect every little nuance and I keep grinding until I get it down. Every song that I don’t already know is a challenge. Having the attention span of a puppy doesn’t help me either, but I stay after it none the less. Being outta my comfort zone challenges me enough to keep me inthralled for at least five or ten minutes anyway. Ooo look a SQUIRREL!!!

Good luck V

 

[JasonE]

Jason, same here with both my parents. Dad passed in 2016 and mom in 2021. They're in my thoughts everyday but prior to my turning 70 this past March is when the reality of how fast it's all going by really hit me and hard. I was a wreck but once my birthday came and went I felt like I jumped over a big hurdle and I've come to terms with a lot of things.

One good thing (for me) about getting older is that you become more settled about certain things. What was once so important doesn't seem to really matter now in the grand scheme of things. But at the same time there is a certain "urgency" but it's not necessarily a desperate "gnawing in the pit of your stomach" urgency if that mackes any sense at all. This world is in such a bad place and I find I'm trying to run as far away from it as far as I can. I think that's part reason why I'm trying to find that youthful hope again. Right now the big hope within is to try and be a good, kind, decent and thoughtful Christian man. That and taking stock with lifes simple offerings and not trying to keep up with the Joneses.

One thing I am all out for is do be the absolute best I can when I play at church. Reason being: I'm serving the Creator of the universe and it's my way of saying thank you for all He's done for me. I'm not rich by any means and for the most part I'm living off my social security. But God's been good to me and He's given me what I need. Can't ask for more than that.

Retirement has worked out good for me. (Sleeping in is wonderul!!). My original plan was to work until I was 68 but I got let go from my job (contract worker) when the virus came to town. So I retired when I was 67 in March of 2020. Again, didn't quite get what I wanted but I got what I needed. Didn't want to work that long but because of the many setbacks I encountered during my working years I had to keep going. So I'm very fortunate in that sense.

So in the meantime I'm taking each day as it comes, trying to move forward while trying to find that spark from my youth. As I said, it's there but right now it only makes "guest apperances" from time to time. But man, it sure feels good when it comes and stays for a few.

This all resonates greatly with me as well. I turned 58 this year. I have been very settled with what I have for about 3 years now. I really see how things that I used to consider "urgent" really isn't urgent. I really let go of a lot of things at 55. I stopped caring about everything being in it home spot and everything being spotless. That was a good thing in my opinion. I let go of a good bit of stress when I stopped caring about those things.

I agree that the world is in a bad place. I too am trying to find ways to isolate myself from it. I stopped using Facebook about a year ago. That was helpful. I have cut toxic people out of my life. That has also been good. I am also trying to be my best person and a good Christian. I used to be someone that over trusted people. I have pulled that back a bit with the way our world is and now I don't give quite as much trust up front but let people earn it. That has kept me from getting into some bad situations.

I used to play in church as well as run the sound board. I alternated between the two. I was very active in that church. We moved to a new state 11 years ago and haven't found a good church in this area. We have found some that are not doing things from the teachings we have had in the past that are guided by scripture. Some of them have been downright scary. We have walked out of some of them in the middle of things.

It is interesting how many of us take similar roads. There are times when I think it is just me but then I read something on a forum and see that it is not. I have shared and had others reply with experiencing the same thing, like this thread. Sometimes it is good to know it is not just you.