How about some humor?

Save for the occasional fibrous asparagus stem, the pasta dish cooked up nicely. Made the recipe from scratch using what was available and what I thought would work. Was actually pretty good.

We grow our own asparagus, although we don't grow enough to last us all year so we have to buy it during winter. My wife grilled a couple steaks last night and grilled the asparagus while she was out there. Good stuff.
 
We grow our own asparagus, although we don't grow enough to last us all year so we have to buy it during winter. My wife grilled a couple steaks last night and grilled the asparagus while she was out there. Good stuff.

Good idea. Was thinking about a chicken florentine pasta sometime soon...the spinach is what provides the iron and nutrients...not so much a steak guy...gotta watch my heart health with red meat...

My brother does the same with his asparagus...have not tried growing any locally myself...may likely do string beans, baby spinach greens, Sungold tomatoes this year...maybe some hardy herbs...last year's herbs fizzled out because of lack of direct sunlight; may try again in a separate location for more direct light...

Otherwise, it's welcome to the dark side...I have cookies...
 
Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?'
She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defence attorney?'

She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'

The defence attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair."
 
I hope this doesn't cross any lines. If so, delete.



A woman is complaining to her tight-wadd husband that her boobs are too small and that he should buy her some implants at the cost of $10,000.

"$10,000!" He exclaimed. "Why not just wadd up some toilet paper and rub it between them once a day?"

She asks “How’s that supposed to make my boobs bigger?”.

He replies “I don’t know but it sure seemed to work for your butt."
 
Ok, this is not a joke from a “real” comedian, or any of us amateurs, but it made me laugh out loud today.

My grandson who is 4, was in pre-school. He, like all other students now, is finishing the year at home. Today, when my daughter was going over his lesson with him, he says “mommy, you’re a good teacher.” Of course she thanks him. He says, “I miss school. I like going to school.” She tells him that she knows he misses his friends, and loves going to school, and that this is just something we all have to deal with it right now.

He says (and this is word for word!) “I miss Mrs (teacher), and I miss the good times we had.”

This is a 4 year old. Where he got something like that, I don’t know but I really laughed out loud at this and so did my wife. Sometimes, even non-professionals are funny! :)
 
Ok, this is not a joke from a “real” comedian, or any of us amateurs, but it made me laugh out loud today.

My grandson who is 4, was in pre-school. He, like all other students now, is finishing the year at home. Today, when my daughter was going over his lesson with him, he says “mommy, you’re a good teacher.” Of course she thanks him. He says, “I miss school. I like going to school.” She tells him that she knows he misses his friends, and loves going to school, and that this is just something we all have to deal with it right now.

He says (and this is word for word!) “I miss Mrs (teacher), and I miss the good times we had.”

This is a 4 year old. Where he got something like that, I don’t know but I really laughed out loud at this and so did my wife. Sometimes, even non-professionals are funny! :)

Having a school teacher wife who is teaching her students online, I can definitely appreciate this post in more ways than one!
 
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