Fender Tone Master Pro pedal board

The operative quote - your basic corporate buzz-speak:

"We wanted to bring that Tonemaster quality to a multi-effect."

OK, sure you do.

How this reminds me of, ""We wanted to position Pontiac as our aspirational brand; to make sure it has the vibe of a classic Pontiac, like the GTO or Bonneville, and we're going to accomplish it with this little 4 cylinder sh!tbox that neither performs in a straight line nor handles nor has a decent interior!"

Which of course always - always - can be translated as:

"I'm a product manager and I'm 100% chock-full of Bullsh!t."

Some guy/gal makes a preposterous, meaningless and/or impossible claim, and every one in that self-deluded corporate-world meeting nods as if they were hearing the Sermon on the Mount and had a clue.

Which they don't, and even if they did, they'd lie and use the buzz phrase to please the boss, because isn't that the goal the boss set for the team? OF COURSE it is!

I've seen this exact thing a million times, in ad meetings, in product briefs, whatever.

If only I enjoyed vomiting as much as I enjoy making fun of corporate-speak buzz phrases, I'd have a puking field day.

Give me some truth, OK?

Truth is, the Tonemasters are acceptablty mediocre digital toys. That's some pretty low hanging fruit. You want to capture the essence of that in your multi-effects pedals?

Gosh, be my guest! Have at it.

Wake me up when you decide to promote the Tonemaster Pro II that, this time, really nails it, And This Time We Really, Really Mean It!

No, seriously, we mean it, and wait until Tonemaster Pro III with its all-new blackout look and larger touch screen that brings that Tonemaster Pro II qua!ity to appeal to high school players near YOU!"

How many meetings just like this in the last 32 years? I don't remember.

Just give me the f^cking purchase order and I'll write the damn music, but don't try to get me to buy in on this odious load of happy horse-pucky.
 
Last edited:
"But Laz, in those corporate meetings you've only called BS a few times. Most of the time you're just desperate for that purchase order and say nothing."

"Well, yeah, but I WANTED to say this every damn time.

"This is why you're no longer invited to corporate marketing meetings."

"Thank the great gods of music!"
 
I Guess I Am Not The Only One On This Forum That Minces Words... ;)
My inability to keep my pie hole shut has lost me more than one client.

I may be in the music business, but the truth is I'm bad at business, and not much better at music. It's a miracle that I've made a living at ad music for all these years!

Or not. Maybe they just don't have a clue about a damn thing and hire me for my fading good looks and formerly-winning personality. ;)
 
Last edited:
But, but, but, but all the U tubers say it is the best thing since sliced bread. Or since the last overhyped piece of kit. Personally, I doubt it will make a good sandwich.

Serious question @László - are you poking fun at it because:
a) You feel all modelers are "substandard" (one could substitute "suck" here) as compared to a good tube amp?
b) You feel the fender tokemaster is substandard as compared to the big 3 or 4 or 5 of modelers in the same price category?
c) You're just taking the piss on corporate marketing, products, product managers etc in general?
d) All of the above?
e) None of the above?
f) I like pie.

I only ask, as it "appears" (haven't seen or heard one in person yet) a nicely built unit with a relatively clean operating system, as compared to the likely suspects. I'd be interested, but it's too expensive for my needs, and the opportunity for option paralysis is as bad as with the rest of the flock of upper tier modelers, with the possible exception of faster navigation (nice touch screen and interface) while rabbit holing.
 
I’m one of those odd guys that loves modelers and tube amps and uses them interchangeably. I even shamelessly combine them from time to time. So, I like a great modeler. One that models great things, accurately.

I’m sure there’s a willing market, and they’ve certainly got a dealer network to push that along. So far for me, Fender digital gear has been substandard and cheap-sounding. Great in the showroom, not so great once in a band mix… just disappears. Very unlike a good ol’ black-face Deluxe Reverb, Super Reverb, or Twin. For their sake, I hope this is better. Because, at this price point, it’s stepping into the ring with the proven big names in modeling. For once, I hope Fender did digital with a Custom Shop mindset, and left their dismal history in this area behind. I’m a Fractal Audio Systems guy so, honestly, I’ll never find out first-hand. But good luck to them nonetheless.
 
c) You're just taking the piss on corporate marketing, products, product managers etc in general?

I'm actually poking a bit of fun at companies that hold their own, previous products up as benchmarks. Because when that happens at meetings it's a somewhat amusing circle jerk, isn't it?

"Yes we love our old, relatively mediocre products! We shall honor them with another somewhat mediocre, me-too product and promote the living **** out of it. What say you, team?"

"Oh yazzzzz, boss-person. We are on it like white on rice, and are beyond orgasmic about your brilliant plan, aren't we, gang?"

[And all the other nodding donkeys indicate their complete agreement with big, fake smiles and pretended enthusiasm.]

I only ask, as it "appears" (haven't seen or heard one in person yet) a nicely built unit with a relatively clean operating system, as compared to the likely suspects.
I'm sure it's fine, for what it is - a relatively clean, nice operating system with a nice case.

After all, that's all it has to be in order to sell.

Uhm...How's it sound?

"It's fabulous," say The Captain & Tenille. [Off camera: "We'll sell ten zillion of these damn things!"]

"I love it," says Pete Thorny Rose. "Check out my track and by the way, Fender, I haven't gotten my check yet."

"I'll eventually get around to expressing an opinion about it," says That Guy In Germany Who Talks A Lot And Reviews Things. "But first I'm going to talk about a bunch of irrelevant stuff, rant like Laszlo, wear some funny clothing, and maybe say something that makes it appear to be a review. Hey, where's my check?"

"We prefer real analog gear and tape and stuff, but we're gonna review this anyway," say Hans und Franz from That Pedal Show, "Und Wir werden dich aufpumpen!"
 
Last edited:
"Laz, you are downright evil in your condemnation of this obviously fine promotional piece."

"I'm unpleasant in plenty of ways, but I'm no sucker for this stuff - even though I'm often a sucker for other stuff that's equally stupid."

"What's the difference, then?"

"Beats me."
 
Well, although not jumping on the ToneMaster praise bandwagon anytime soon, it must be said that when an ingenious product makes its way to consumer market, there are bound to be various bugs and glitches that need re-working. Ola with his YT video makes this point painfully clear. The ToneMaster Pro does exhibit several computer OS bugs that will need work.

Yet, let's remember one fact that has occurred down through history...even the most intelligent scientists and naturalists of this world when they tried to publish their treatises on their research and discoveries were met with staunch rebuke from the authorities of the day. These wise men were forced to recant their research, or go underground and publish their work in secrecy, for fear of public humiliation, and losing their lives.

Since we are no longer in the dark ages or Renaissance, respect for science has come a long way. Though let it be known that even Einstein was met with criticism and rancor simple because his constructs were something no one had ever heard of before, or tried to replicate in the laboratory. It took many years before Einstein's work was accepted as original and something new and fresh.

Fast forward to today: There are several amps/effect/cabinets modelers on the scene who are striving to improve their products both with improved hardware, but more importantly, adjustable software with upgradable firmware.

To the tried and true amp purist, this seems like an affront on what they are comfortable and familiar with. Yet, to the individuals who enjoy working under the hood of a high-performance muscle car, there is the corresponding group of people who enjoy tweaking parameters according to what their ears like, and shouldn't this be the case?

Most recording engineers make their living using their ears to create a high-quality product, and perhaps while this does not elevate the average Joe to the standard of the good recording engineer, it does help everyday guitarists develop an ear and understanding for sound and tone.

While there may always be a market niche for tube amps, human creativity, innovation, and research may always be the driving force which keeps technology moving forward. Rather than shun new technology, shouldn't we embrace it as our parents and grandparents did during the 20th century? And perhaps as technology keeps moving forward, we'll keep discovering new ways to cope with everyday problems that still beg to be answered.
 
Full report please!

Will do, once we get the London (Kempton) Show out of the way.

First thing I'll try, in all probability, is to stick it through some of the different power sections and speaker setups I've been using lately. The Two Rocks will go first, as there's the ODS capture in the Tonex to compare as a front end. I've got a lot of separate tube power amps to try it with, as well as the Two Rocks' own power sections. So - plenty of possibilities.

I've been playing the older TRs (CRS V1 and LTD) for nigh on twenty years now; if it can convince me at this level, I reckon it'll be capable of anything.
 
Back
Top