It doesn't sound like this is going anywhere good. I hate to say that but the situations I have been in that are similar have never worked out no matter how hard I have tried to make them work out. I have learned to cut the losses and save the stress. It would either be her or me at this point. If they choose to stay with her, they will very quickly find out how much you were doing and realize that this is too much work.I keep on asking myself why am I doing this? Why do I keep on doing this? My husband thinks I am nuts. He says you do everything for this band and all they do is give you grief. He can see it when I come home from rehearsal. My body language, facial expressions and my mood isn’t the greatest.