A Compendium Of Truly Terrible Dad Jokes

The three brothers (Ray, Roy and I) did a 50th Anniversary Celebration for our parents in 1992. Typically there were some words spoken by friends and relatives, and my Dad, was never one to miss out on a witty reply, he blessed us with this ditty:
"The boys all told me that there were to be no gifts at this function, and I'm going to tell you all why. Raymond just bought a new RV, and it was so expensive that he didn't have anything left over for Mother and I. Roy just got a new jet boat, and he's stretched real tight. Daryl just got a new motorcycle so he has no money left for anything. So boys, let me share a small secret with you tonight...it's time I came clean and told you all that your mother and I were never married."
There was a rather pregnant pause, and then Raymond stood and looked at Dad and said:
"So you're telling us that we three boys are actually bastards?"
Dad sternly replied:
"Yes son, that is true...and damned cheap ones if I do say so!"