4000 posts about nothing...

[CandidPicker]

...PTC was up to their gills with backordered table legs. Deja was indeed a table leg muncher when he (it?) wasn't working on his (its?) own. That, and Val had just brewed a fresh pot of joe that was about to join her travel mug in the car. "Now you stay here, and don't munch too much," Val chided Deja...

Deja whined just a little, Val gave him a cookie, and she was off to...

 

[Alnus Rubra]

....Home Depot for....

 

[dmatthews]

... zip ties, clear glue, a shovel, 8 9v batteries, and some rope.
Her plan was to...

 

[CandidPicker]

....Home Depot for....

...jerryrig the dehumidifier solution to her latest thermostat malady. Apparently, Val was not only sticky from humidity, but also was awake late into the night. Finally, her burrito microwave timer pinged once again, Val munched gleefully, and was then about to use her stand mixer. It was time to make the...

 

[Tucson Thump]

watch old reruns of MacGyver to learn how to create a ....

 

[dmatthews]

... miniature version of a Viking ship, which she planned to escape in after she kidnapped...

 

[CandidPicker]

watch old reruns of MacGyver to learn how to create a ....

...an intergalactic wormhole time portal. Val didn't know anything about astrophysics, so she just waved to the MP who was watching the entire scene. "If I don't see you in the future, I'll see you in the pasture!" chimed Val. The MP took off his aviator sunglasses and squinted at the...

 

[CandidPicker]

...deionizer that supposedly provided clean air to the complex...Val thought to herself..."It's a bit windy out here..."

 

[CandidPicker]

So, Val texted Larry, her beautician, and scheduled a spa day. Val wanted to look good for her date with Shawn, though she thought “good appearance” was only a formality for more important occasions. Val carried a brush and comb, but was at the mercy of high humidity when she traveled. Val thought it wise to do the “pony-tail” method instead and cancelled her beautician appointment. (“This will save both time and money,” thought Val). So Val sat down to meditate, hydrate, and reflect on her day. “Shawn can appreciate a gal when she looks normal, not gussied up,” thought Val, “I just hope he doesn’t mind my hairy legs...”

Val giggled and stepped into....

 

[goat-n-gitter]

....one of our alternate story lines. The Mexican restaurateur was zooming past the house in his battered old Merc chasing down yet another dine-and-dasher. He was headed straight for Deja, who was sprawled out near the curb munching on an elaborately turned pernambuco bed post, which had taken the PTC many man hours to create. Not knowing how she could save the groundhog's life, Val grabbed the first thing that fell to hand....

 

[Tucson Thump]

, her annotated third-hand copies of "Pride, Prejudice, and Zombies" and "Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters" and hurled them toward ....

 

[CandidPicker]

...her boss, whom she was trying to seduce. Turns out Val only wanted to have a little harmless fun, but she forgot that the boss was immune to her ways. Val thought, "This will be the talk of the secretary's pool tomorrow," but the boss wasn't a fool like Val imagined, and now her innocent tryst was about to backfire big-time. Val didn't know what lay ahead, but it sure wasn't going to be...

 

[Tucson Thump]

this alternative life she was going to keep dancing in. Instead she decided to jump to ....

 

[Black Plaid]

...her boss, whom she was trying to seduce. Turns out Val only wanted to have a little harmless fun, but she forgot that the boss was immune to her ways. Val thought, "This will be the talk of the secretary's pool tomorrow," but the boss wasn't a fool like Val imagined, and now her innocent tryst was about to backfire big-time. Val didn't know what lay ahead, but it sure wasn't going to be...

an HR violation, after all, she worked for Seductions R Us, and Boss, her new secretary, should have been expecting it as part of the training regime. However, hurling wasn't something she'd taken a lot of time to practice, and the books ended up ...

 

[Ryan Murphy]

lost to the sands of of time. What was Val supposed to do now. She knew if they wernt recovered boss would...

 

[CandidPicker]

...pretend Val's appearance wasn't up to industry standards, and ask her to change out of her street clothes (in which she was eating her burrito) and get ready for work. Val was purely interested in what would make her boss happy, though her less than professional appearance was the sticking point for her boss. Val knew her place in the business, and the boss had done his job teaching his employees how to do theirs. Now it was up to Val to carry on with her part...Val gathered up her briefcase portfolio, her travel mug in her other hand, and her keys to her car. Val had been assigned to...

 

[goat-n-gitter]

...disregard all tangents the thread might take and get back to doing what she did best - stealing mexican food and hanging out with large rodents, with a minor in exotic hardwoods. This couldn't have come at a better time, as just then Deja was on the verge of.....

 

[Wakester]

reaching for the burled maple neck of a fender Strat. DEJA! Val shouted, "you know maple disagrees with your tummy" Deja whimpered as if agreeing, then wobbled away towards the ...

 

[Tucson Thump]

old pickup truck. Val yelled "Remember your keys!" and tossed a set with a "Lumber Liquidators" keychain attached. Who knew flooring could be such good roughage, but that maple went through Deja like ....

 

[Wakester]

Red Alder through a planer, or Tacos through her. But Oh! They were sooo gooood! "Alexa, remind me to order to go tonight" she said. "Ok, I'll order 200 tacos tonight" "Nooooooo....."